The Quiet Heroes of Care

Yesterday, I was walking along the small river beside our appartment with a young and sparky Jack Russell terrier named Otto dancing round my feet.

As sometimes happens, I bumped into a group of handicapped people being guided by two young people in their 20’s, one probably of African descent the other Flemish.

Each of them was holding a young handicapped adult by the hand, while intermittently looking round to check on the others in the band, most of whom seemed in high spirits

They gave me a warm smile

As I went by, both the guides gave me a warm smile which I gladly returned.

I suddenly felt so grateful to these two people, doing a job I am unlikely to do – and with such love and grace. I saw and felt the well of human care behind their kind faces and it opened my heart.

I went on to reflect how the quality and role of care is just so under-valued in our society. How is the work of these two carers values socially through status? How is their work valued financially? In moreHuman we talk of ‘big little heroes’ – well these two were my heroes yesterday, and I wish I had gone back to tell them.

Captains of care

Status and money go to ‘captains of industry’, crackshot lawyers, brilliant doctors…

‘Captains of carers’ or ‘crackshot carers’ don’t sound very likely, do they?

Even within the non-commercial world, it is the more masculine heroes such as firemen that receive the glory (which is often well-deserved) – but what about the carers?

" We need to stop seeing heroism as something spectacular. "

The smiles were a spontaneous expression of a warm heart

At moreHuman we have already hypothesized that showing up and ‘outer work’ can take a project form and a spontaneous form, both of which are equally important. Helping handicapped people is of course a project and a noble one, but the smiles we exchanged, the conversation I should have had, however brief, that is just a spontaneous expression of a heart that is open, alive to the present moment and what it reveals.

It made me think of Mechelen, the city in which I so happily live.

My favourite area is the beguinewijk, partly because of its beauty, partly because of the culture of the ‘beguinen’, women of the middle ages who often left a life of riches to devote themselves to caring for the disadvantaged. Their vows were made completely of their own volition, they owed no formal loyalty to the church or indeed any man. They often lived communally. A life of prayer and service. The meeting of inner and outer work. Big little heroes.

" Showing up is also caring. "

Personally I do not find it easy to fall into the caring part of myself – I am very action-oriented. But I notice when I do, not only do I see the impact but I also feel my own heart opening and the fulfilment that comes from that opening. When giving comes from the heart and is received in the heart, the distinction between giving and receiving dissolves in one warm glow…

Captains of Care, tell us who you are.

The jungle of communication channels swirling around us these days are not exactly full of care and kindness. The theme I am bringing here is hardly new, but as far as moreHuman is concerned, surely the quality of care, the quality of a warm heart must be at the core. It can make you happy too. My guess is that within the moreHuman network there are already various ‘captains of care’ – if so please let us know, let us learn from you!

Showing up is also caring.